Tales from the Crib

Matthew: "Mom, Mom, we found a little animal that goes like this [demonstrates a dramatic all over body wiggle] when you hold it in one place. Come see it! Where is that little wiggly worm guy?"

Me: "Matthew, that's a caterpillar."

And Matthew and his friends dragged it off to play. Oh, the poor little wiggly worm guy.

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In the bath this morning, Maggie wanted to know what the little black things coming out of her Spongebob squirt toy were. I told her it was just dirt--mildew--from the inside and it wouldn't hurt her. When I went to take her out of the tub, I said, "Ew, look at all those yucky things in there."

Maggie replied, "Yes, yes, yes. I know. I sit in them. But their not bite me."

How Worried Should I Be?

Maggie has never really clicked with women. In her baby days, she was known for her cold, uncanny stare that made even the sweetest grandma in the check-out line uncomfortable. But men...oh boy, she can sure charm the men.

At the Memorial Day barbecue tonight, every dad came up to me and said something along the lines of, "Is that little blond girl your daughter? She's so sweet! She was... [insert story of Maggie's cuteness.]"

Yes, my daughter, at two-years old, already has the ability to melt the hearts of grown men. Brian, of course, is smitten--has been since the day she was born. And Grandpa Swings is wrapped very firmly around that little finger. He's been known to spend hours watching the goats and ducks on the backside of their fence purely for her entertainment. Even one of Brian's friends started keeping gum in his pocket just because she'd ask for it.

Her powers are not reserved for the adult males, however. Nathan and Matthew think their little sister is a pain in the neck most of the time (and she can be, being a proper younger sister) but their friends...oh, that's a different story. One of Matthew's friends has a crush on her--he's in kindergarten and she's two!

If she can accomplish all of this with her wide blue eyes at two, what will she do at 14...18...21? Heaven help us! I really think Brian's considered the Rapunzel tactic...

Hallelujah

Finally sick and tired of listening to the constant bickering, I pulled out the Kindness Rocks last night. Not only did peace quickly ensue, suddenly Matthew was following Maggie around taking care of her every need (a task that would wear out even the most patient, compassionate soul) and Nathan was hard at work scrubbing the main floor clean ( he picked up the clutter, swept, vacuumed, and MOPPED!) And they did it all without even being asked. !!!

What is this miracle called Kindness Rocks, you ask?

Last year, I bought a few jars and some colorful glass pebbles at the dollar store. When the boys do something "kind" (like obey Mom or help out or resolve an argument respectfully--yes, it IS possible, folks) they get one or a few or a handful of rocks in their jar. When their jar is full, they can choose a family outing (or a prize from the dollar store if they're feeling materialistic). Of course, they can lose rocks too: name-calling is a real hurdle for Nathan.

These rocks got us through the move last year but they kind of fell into disuse in-between houses. Why, oh, why have I waited so long to pull them out again?

Here's to positive reinforcement!

And Now the Red...

I love the stripes! And so do the boys. I got lazy--typical for me and my projects--and just put the colors on the wall instead of painting a clear or background-colored coat first to fill in the tiny gaps under the tape. So it could've come out with cleaner edges but oh well, it's done...!

Stories in Blue Paint

How many of you, by show of hands, have painted walls while carrying a baby in a sling? That's what I thought. I win the Multi-Tasking Mother of the Year Award! (And for those of you worried about Rebecca's safety, it was only one coat of paint on a two inch stripe running at waist height around the room--not a big deal, but enough to lull her to sleep.)

Note to self: next time, start painting when the baby is already asleep, not still trying to fall asleep. You just drive each other crazy and it turned a half-hour project into a two hour project.

Also note to self: next time, don't even try painting unless the boys are unconscious or out of the house because they will beg and beg and beg and beg you to help until finally you cave in and let them take the wet tape off the walls and they will inevitably get dark blue paint on the wall and just make it worse by trying to scrub it off with a cloth already covered in blue paint and then trip on the giant pile of wet tape they had created and probably you will find blue paint on their clothes and tracked on the carpet but you're too afraid to look very closely right now and pretty much the boys just end up endangering their lives. Just say no!

Oh the Unfairness of It All

This is where Brian is:the Fairmont Mayakoba Resort on the Riviera Maya just outside of Cancun, Mexico.

And this is where I am:
up to my elbows in boy junk, excuse me, "treasures" as we deep clean, rearrange, and paint the boys' room while Dad is away.

I was supposed to tag along on Brian's all-expenses paid trip (he ended up numero quatro in sales in the nation for his company last year--woot woot for hubby!) but we decided tooling around Mexico is not the best place for a six-week old baby. And there's no way I'm going to leave a breastfeeding infant for a week (pump for six days? No way, Jose!) So Brian had to drag a friend along instead--and I'm sure it was really difficult to talk him into it.

Brian keeps reassuring me that the sand is not white, the water is not blue, and he did not get seasick on his deep-sea fishing adventure (10 foot waves in a 31 foot boat--but he caught a mahi-mahi about the size of Maggie). Somehow, I just don't believe him.

And my project helpers are flagging in their enthusiasm. The boys would rather spend their school vacation doing just about anything rather than cleaning out their bedroom. Tough luck, I tell them. Life isn't fair...just ask me.

New Tricks

Matthew learned how to ride a bicycle yesterday. He basically just hopped on and took off! He's been practicing around and around the block ever since--with Maggie running along behind (and usually barefoot).

Matthew: "You wanna know something really real, Mom? Colin told us that every bike has a number on it that says how fast the bike can go, so we looked all over this bike and we found the number 500. So that means this bike can go 500 piles an hour!"

I guess it could be really real, who knows how fast a pile an hour is anyway?

Analysis of the Daily Activities of the Female Adult, or "Mom"

After a week of research, I have concluded that if I quit sleeping, eating, showering, and using the bathroom I would be able to get everything done and even possibly make it on time to various functions like soccer games, school bus stops and church.

But it would kill me. Literally.

And so I will just have to continue trying to juggle the selfish activities that keep me alive with housecleaning, laundry, ironing, homework, kids' sports, breastfeeding, diaper changing, grocery shopping, cooking, dishes, disciplining, listening, hugging, fulfilling church callings, and giving husband attention.

Happy belated Mother's Day.

Local Volcanic Activity

Nathan's school report involved diet coke, mentos, and a volcano made with newspaper balls and tin foil. Watch out below!

Just a Spoonful of Sugar...

To (sort of) clean your stairs, you need two vacuums, four boys (Nathan, Matthew and neighborhood friends, Collin and Chase), and the words: "Ready, set, go!"

Brian was upset at all the junk on the floor missed by their hasty vacuuming, but I give them points for creativity.

Touchdown!

Nathan scored his first ever flag football touchdown today. Whoo-hoo, Nathan!

Ready, set, hike!

Circle back...

Oh no! But he somehow breaks through...

And into the end zone... Touchdown!

Nathan got a celebratory hug from his touchdown girl: little sister Maggie.

You know it's good when...

Maggie, licking a push-pop and smacking her lips: "Duh-wicious."

The Creation of a Yard

And Brian said, Let there be grass: and--after only a couple of hours and two trips to the sod farm because he miscalculated the first time--there was grass. And Brian saw that it was good. And Elly saw that it was very good, yea, even exceedingly good.

And the afternoon was the two hundred and thirty-sixth day (that we've lived in this house--which was yesterday).

And Elly said, Next, let there be trees and a sandbox and a fence: and Brian said, Yes ma'am.

One Month Old

Becca Banana

and Dad

O Sleep, Where Art Thou?

At 1:00 A.M. I fed Becca while rubbing Maggie's growing pains in her legs and nodding off to sleep.

Yeah, I'm talented like that.

Finally, Becca finished her meal and went back to bed. But Maggie had to climb in our bed and have her legs rubbed by Dad for another half an hour.

Yeah, she's spoiled like that.

After her 4:00 feeding, Becca woke up fussy at 5:30 A.M. Instead of waking up enough to figure out what was wrong, I just brought her to bed and dozed while intermittently shoving a binky back in her mouth.

Yeah, I'm lazy like that.

By the time my alarm went off at 7:00 this morning, we had four people in our bed. I'm not sure anyone got much sleep.

And I realized I was lying directly on top of the wooden rail of our hard-sided water bed. No wonder my back was so sore.

I never did figure out why Becca was so fussy last night. Maybe her feet were cold--she didn't have any socks on. But she went right back to sleep after her 7:00 breakfast.

I wish I could have climbed in bed, too.

Maybe I still will.